Soggy toast
Damn you!
Soggy toast, you suck!
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Friday, July 23, 2010
Things that suck #11
Being in a hurry and not knowing why.
"Why are you taking so long?!" Excuse me? Are we in a rush? "Ya, I told my friend that we'd see her in 1/2 hour!" but, but, now I'm thrown off!! Crap!! Aaahhhhh!
Being in a hurry and not knowing why sucks!!
"Why are you taking so long?!" Excuse me? Are we in a rush? "Ya, I told my friend that we'd see her in 1/2 hour!" but, but, now I'm thrown off!! Crap!! Aaahhhhh!
Being in a hurry and not knowing why sucks!!
Things that suck #10
Dumb drivers
I'll differentiate dumb from aggressive or reckless. Aggressive is speeding to get around me before my lane ends (shame on you); reckless is veering in and out of my lane to get around me before my lane ends (wow, you might kill yourself); dumb is aimlessly speeding and slowing mindlessly, ensuring that I can't get into another lane before mine ends. Dumb driver, you are a mess! Doing your makeup, talking on your cell phone, and eating a footlong - you are a hot mess of driving fail!
Dumb drivers, you suck!
I'll differentiate dumb from aggressive or reckless. Aggressive is speeding to get around me before my lane ends (shame on you); reckless is veering in and out of my lane to get around me before my lane ends (wow, you might kill yourself); dumb is aimlessly speeding and slowing mindlessly, ensuring that I can't get into another lane before mine ends. Dumb driver, you are a mess! Doing your makeup, talking on your cell phone, and eating a footlong - you are a hot mess of driving fail!
Dumb drivers, you suck!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Things that suck #9
Really slow computers.
Chug, chug, chug. You are like the Little Engine that Can't.
Really slow computers, you suck!
Chug, chug, chug. You are like the Little Engine that Can't.
Really slow computers, you suck!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Things that suck #8
Toasters that under/over cook toast regardless of the settings
Toast, I don't understand why they've equipped you with five settings, all of which scorch my toast? Why no have four settings that toast and one for burn? Then when I want to hear the fire detector's sultry tones, I can. Because, really, most of the time I just want standard frakken toast!
Wonky Toaster, you suck!
Toast, I don't understand why they've equipped you with five settings, all of which scorch my toast? Why no have four settings that toast and one for burn? Then when I want to hear the fire detector's sultry tones, I can. Because, really, most of the time I just want standard frakken toast!
Wonky Toaster, you suck!
Things that suck #7
Lost.
Seriously - that's how you end the show?!
Hows this for an ending? Lost, you suck!
Seriously - that's how you end the show?!
Hows this for an ending? Lost, you suck!
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Things that sucks #6
Power outages.
Yeah - it's vaguely romantic; but, more than that, it's annoying! Worst of all, you may never know this due to the current power outage.
Power outages - You suck!'
Yeah - it's vaguely romantic; but, more than that, it's annoying! Worst of all, you may never know this due to the current power outage.
Power outages - You suck!'
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Things that suck #5
A leaky roof.
Seriously Roof? You've only got one job and you suck at it?! I would understand if you were a combination roof/floor/wall; you wouldn't know what to protect from what. I would totally dig that; choices are tough. But serious, roof - you stop things from the sky from getting through you. You are like my sky bouncer: hot girls, yes; rain/dudes, no. I understand if you can't stop asteroids or friggen tree branches - but rain, come on. I treat you right! New shingles and good support; but in return, stop the dang rain!
Leaky roof, you suck!
Seriously Roof? You've only got one job and you suck at it?! I would understand if you were a combination roof/floor/wall; you wouldn't know what to protect from what. I would totally dig that; choices are tough. But serious, roof - you stop things from the sky from getting through you. You are like my sky bouncer: hot girls, yes; rain/dudes, no. I understand if you can't stop asteroids or friggen tree branches - but rain, come on. I treat you right! New shingles and good support; but in return, stop the dang rain!
Leaky roof, you suck!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Things that suck #3
Leeches.
Creepy worms that suck your blood - who's idea was that? Come on! I can't take a swim without getting attacked by tiny, blood eating snakes?
Also, people who benefit from your work in a devious way. "Hey dude, what do you think about this?" AKA, could you finish my work for me and let me take the credit?!
Leeches (literal and figurative) Suck!
Creepy worms that suck your blood - who's idea was that? Come on! I can't take a swim without getting attacked by tiny, blood eating snakes?
Also, people who benefit from your work in a devious way. "Hey dude, what do you think about this?" AKA, could you finish my work for me and let me take the credit?!
Leeches (literal and figurative) Suck!
Things that suck #4
Long stories with little, to no, payoff.
You know when someone tells you a story and keeps veering off to give details or exceptions that ultimately have nothing to do with the "punchline"?
For example, You-"Did I ever tell you about the hilarious time at Canada's Wonderland?" Me-"No, please tell me." You-"So we went on a Tuesday, wait it was a Wednesday - the 17th of July... Wait August? No, July... July 14 - oh ya. So, anyway we get there and John brought his sunglasses, no wait, he didn't... Oh that was the time at Cape Cod... Anyway - long story short: a bird crapped on him."
Ya, so that LONG story wasn't SHORT at all. So, Mr. Kipling, let's stick to bullet points! I'll ask for more detail if I feel that it's necessary and, guess what, I won't.
Long, pointless stories Suck!
You know when someone tells you a story and keeps veering off to give details or exceptions that ultimately have nothing to do with the "punchline"?
For example, You-"Did I ever tell you about the hilarious time at Canada's Wonderland?" Me-"No, please tell me." You-"So we went on a Tuesday, wait it was a Wednesday - the 17th of July... Wait August? No, July... July 14 - oh ya. So, anyway we get there and John brought his sunglasses, no wait, he didn't... Oh that was the time at Cape Cod... Anyway - long story short: a bird crapped on him."
Ya, so that LONG story wasn't SHORT at all. So, Mr. Kipling, let's stick to bullet points! I'll ask for more detail if I feel that it's necessary and, guess what, I won't.
Long, pointless stories Suck!
Monday, July 12, 2010
Things that suck #2
Waiting for a ride.
People ask if you're 'ok'. People offer to drive you. Really, the only problem is that you and your ride weren't effectively coordinated - and it sucks!
P.S. I left #1 for something that really sucks!! Though I guess that they font have to be in order. Hmm, maybe #1 will be my ability to decide which order things suck in? Maybe?
People ask if you're 'ok'. People offer to drive you. Really, the only problem is that you and your ride weren't effectively coordinated - and it sucks!
P.S. I left #1 for something that really sucks!! Though I guess that they font have to be in order. Hmm, maybe #1 will be my ability to decide which order things suck in? Maybe?
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